I've Got My Joy Back: With God you can regain your joy, no matter how tough your circumstances may be. (0)

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So I played “When peace like a river …” and “Breathe on me Breath of God” and many other worshipful hymns – and drove my stepmother mad!

Tina instructed the doctors to pretend they weren't sure where Isaiah might top out, even though the truth was obvious. I dated around and partied a lot to make up for an über-strict upbringing and an awkward few college years. We also have to stand up for a million and one other targeted groups, thanks to the weaponized hatred proliferating everywhere. I realize now that there were quite a few things I could actively do every day to pull myself out of this dark place. There on that sheet of paper, in my own handwriting, were all the things I’d always known but didn’t yet see.And right now, it feels like we’re all living the life of the guilty Catholic: There’s no room to just feel what you feel without self-imposed judgment. In Spanaway, Washington, where Thomas was born, and Tacoma, where pickup runs were more intense, Isaiah leveraged the ball for a spot in local games.

The only way that your “bad” desires or moments of weakness or recurring obsessions are going to eat you alive or blow up your life is if you don’t know yourself that well and you don’t trust yourself and you don’t love yourself and you secretly want to punish yourself just for being a human animal with perfectly normal ideas and urges and yes, even shifting philosophies about what your life should be. After struggling with this for close to a year, I finally realized why she had grown to be such a focal point in my life. After Jesus’ resurrection, they were full of joy…just as Jesus had promised, and the joy Jesus gives stays! So the only morally defensible way to live involves diving straight into depressing world news 24/7 while working yourself into the ground? Shouldn’t it fill us with joy to know that the wrath of God was withheld from us and placed onto Christ on our behalf?

I recognized the random strokes of luck that life handed me and appreciated them, and it seemed like more of these things happened as a result. Some days are tougher than others, but I’m so thankful Papa doesn’t give up on us even when we forget about some of our basics! But so often, the first part says not to grieve, I never thought I could be doing that, but I guess I was.